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Quote:
It is so hard with the job situation, her A, and her down right spiteful behavior.


These are all fixable problems. What's the goal? How will I achieve it? Take action, get feedback, adjust and move on.
Swallow the elephant one bite at a time. You can handle it.


M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12
Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
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DLS - This situation is trying my resolve. I am committed to my marriage and my family. I did not go into marriage thinking it would be perfect all the time. I just need focus on why I am staying. M to me was meant to be forever. If she D, I will fight for me and the kids to the best of my ability. It is something no one wants, but it is something I have to accept with the

Thank you for the continued support to my thread. It feels good to have you and others provide support to me during these times.


ME-41 W-33 M-8 D-8 S-4 D 5/17/2010
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Spite is intent.

Her behaviour may just be a very bad reaction/MLC/mental issue.

Try to find excuses to understand, while resonable boundaries to protect.

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Originally Posted By: Onthemountaintop
Spite is intent.

Her behaviour may just be a very bad reaction/MLC/mental issue.

Try to find excuses to understand, while resonable boundaries to protect.


LSG,

Sometimes I found that the WAS "protect" their affair and "protect" their phisod behind it. That means YOU are an enemy to the affair. So as long as she's involved in it, she's working against you. Keep in mind, sometimes it may be logical for bad things to happen to us.

I wanted to say, some of us DB'ers in area's close to each other may as well visit each other for support. I know how isolated it can feel, and after your local friends have heard your problem for so long, they might not want to hear it any more.

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Coach - Thank you for taking time to visit my thread and give those very helpful words of wisdom.

I will have to handle it somehow. I am not sure what course of action I should take, but I will come up with a solution.

I know having a job is priority #1 for me.

Thank you for keeping me focused on what I need to do.


ME-41 W-33 M-8 D-8 S-4 D 5/17/2010
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DLS,

Thanks. You are so correct.

I have been trying to decide if I should call the OMW to see what is going on. I have not called because I do not want to waste my time.

I know the focus should be on me right now and my M, not his. I will decide soon.

Last edited by LSG; 05/14/10 07:34 PM.

ME-41 W-33 M-8 D-8 S-4 D 5/17/2010
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OTMT - Very good points. Thank you very much.


ME-41 W-33 M-8 D-8 S-4 D 5/17/2010
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Originally Posted By: LSG
DLS,

Thanks. You are so correct.

I have been trying to decide if I should call the OMW to see what is going on. I have not called because I do not want to waste my time.

I know the focus should be on me right now and my M, not his. I will decide soon.


LSG,

I was thinking about this point,when I'm figuring out how the hell I can communicate with my most likely soon to be ex-wife. Since I had done an affair in a past relationship I know the mindset and how hard it is to penetrate.

The message can come from other people. Also their affair needs to be broken, it helps if she's dumped horribly and embarrassed behind the event. Also if life events that occur that show that its much easier, cheaper and better for her to stay committed to the marriage.

Right now while she has that alternate life that she prefers to stay in, all of us are stuck until something happens.

The odds say we aren't going to talk this change into them, nor will anyone else. Something has to happen. And they will not usually come to their senses. What they are doing feels really good to them.

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Originally Posted By: LSG
I wish WAW was nervous about something about losing me, but it does not seem that she is.


You dont know that for a fact. Someday you will be able to test that null hypothesis.

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You test this by serving the papers, not the threat of it?

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