NM, your 'flaws' are not flaws... they are also not reasons for your H to have left! If he felt strongly about some of the things you mentioned above, then why didnt he bring it up in normal conversation, so that you could have had the opportunity to work on these tiny tidbits that make up the person you are, the person he fell in love with and the person he married!
By the way, dont believe a word he said! Did he tell you this stuff when he left or afterwards or just things you feel are what he didnt like? either way, dont believe him and dont put yourself down!
And good for you for showing him you are PERFECT!!! Woohoo!!! Let him see how silly those 'flaws' are and were and that they are fixable!
When H dropped the bomb on me he came out with the most bazaar 'flaws'. I am no where near perfect, but i always thought my H loved everything about me even my wierd and silly ways. He said I didnt like to go out anymore... ummm we have no money bc you are in school and not working, spend too much time studying, and walks in the park and watching a movie togetehr or going for ice cream are free or really inexpensive! there were other stupid comments he made too at the time. when i brough it up and told him they were stupid reasons to leave and not valid reasons for a divorce he sort of laughed it off, realizing they were in fact dumb comments to make, apologized while saying he doesnt remember saying those things. The excuse then became that he never put me first in his life and therefore fell out of love with me. I did tell him he didnt make me first. more so recently w school, and 12 years ago when we were teenagers! A month or so ago, H made a comment that he would need to put me first if we ever worked things out, and also said 'you told me i NEVER put you first, so i dont know how to' and i replied with you did put me first 90% of our years together. i always thought you loved me more than i loved you... i always felt he put me on a pedastal... i guess one where not being fun was tucked somewhere in the middle. hate how they take one negative comment and live off of it!!!
Like you NM, i am working on my confidence and 'flaws'. I notice that when i am confident around H, he tends to like it a bit more...
