Yep there were issues with her Dad about her sexuality. Her Dad just always said nothing about it, and it took combined efforts of sMIL and a few others to get him to attend the wedding. Which he did, bless him, and enjoyed greatly. It wasn't a surprise to him she's gay, she'd been taking ladies home since the age of 16, and taken the approach many of us do - not in your face, but not hiding it either. I'm not so sure about what her Mum thought about it, as I didn't really get to know her before she died. Me and her Dad always got on extremely well though, and he genuinely cares for me, as evidenced by always asking after me and being upset if I didn't accompany STBXW to the farm on her visits. I think he's just a stubborn farmer, the whole gay thing is a bit outside his comfort zone, and difficult for him to explain to the rest of his cronies. The whole family of in-laws have never been anything but wonderful to me in both emotional and practical terms however, and all the cronies seemed genuinely delighted for us too.
It all makes her most ridiculous comment of "I married you to protect my father" even more stupid as it was such a difficult thing for the FIL to come away from the farm for a whole weekend, leaving livestock and having to explain where he was going etc. And then she was exposing him to me having half of all their family assests, so hardly a protective act! I repeatedly asked for explanation of that one, but she just said same words over and over instead!
The OM are vile and in our cases most definitely a couple of sandwiches short of a picnic, but indeed it is as you say that our spouses have also behaved in an incredibly cruel and hurtful way. I still find myself demonizing the OW all the time, and have to keep reminding myself that my wife chose that path of action too. She may also never regret it. Very sobering.
Glad you're feeling human again (((((JacT)))))
Saf - would love to meet up. Do I need to bring some drugs and a friendly set of sturgeons for you both? Are there other Midlands DBers? Hope your long ride was a lot of fun.
Reality is that which, if you don't believe in it, doesn't go away.
