I hope your son doesn't say these things to her. I know he's blowing off steam and I don't blame her, but it's this kind of stuff that will make it hard for her to forgive herself and build her self esteem when this is all over. I know it's a little thing, but it would matter a great deal to me if the kids thought I didn't do grocery shopping well.
He doesn't say anything to her. He's afraid she will get mad at him if he says anything like that to her. She started smoking when this whole thing started. She hid it well for 2 years but it's really picked up over the past year. She doesn't know that kids knows she smokes. They won't say anything because they've seen her anger and they walk on eggshells around her.
They won't say anything because they've seen her anger and they walk on eggshells around her.
Oh, that stinks also. My stepchildren were parentified (that means they were in a home where they had to be the adults b/c the adults were either acting like children or not home) - they were watching their baby brothers since they were 8, cooking, cleaning, changing diapers, feeding them, etc.
When they came to live with H and I, it was very hard for DSD16 to let go of the CONTROL she felt she needs to have. With this crisis, she's trying again to control everyone, and it's so hard to see how the children react. It's so hard to just let it be - they're older now, so they can choose the R they will or will not have with H.
How do you feel about your children walking on eggshells? Maybe it's time they said something if it would clear the air?
I know that H wasn't going to come to DSD's sweet sixteen and I said nothing. Finally, I had had enough and said something to him about how she was feeling, which prompted him to say he'd be there for her, but then he wound up leaving anyway when her friends didn't show up... just the time when she really needed him the most.
Not giving advice, just showing you some situations and how they've panned out, I guess.
Just checking in and wanted to say that you sound good. Keep up the good work.
God Bless, Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
Nothing like a little trash talk in MAY! Gotta love it. Good to see u still have that sense of humor. How are you and the kids doing? Are they going to play football this year?