Thank you everyone. Your support today really helped a lot.
Well, I'll be damned... Stbx just sent a 3rd proposal (without any commentary about my worthiness as a woman and wife) that I can actually work with. I'll discuss with my atty tomorrow. I refused to talk to him today, and I think he may have realized that he was out of line with his previous correspondence.
If we get the deal done this weekend, we can file the papers within a week, and then in about 6 weeks I should be legally free of this guy.
