The problem with the EA your wife was/is having is that they work together... the common wisdom on the subject... almost universally claims that ALL CONTACT must be cut off... COMPLETELY... for the affair to end... These two work together... They don't HAVE to do talk though, OM is CHOOSING to go up to talk to her...
I would let the OMW know and find out how she wants to play this... I think this can be handled without you even having to interact with your wife...
The mail is another thing... I really don't know why she has two phones in the first place... if you dont' need it and she isnt' using it you could just clear all the content and tell her you are cancelling the service since she has her own phone... why two damn phones?
