Thank you all again for your feedback. GALing helps me quite a bit. Dating is not meant for the W. I am no longer standing for my marriage. It's been over two years since the initial discovery of the adultery. I'm all done standing. She is adamate that everything is finished and it is pretty apparent by her actions and words over the course of two years that she is done with the marriage. She is low self esteem and looks to others who don't know her to pump her self back up again. I know too much about her underbelly and therefore I truly believe that she would never come around. That is just my opinion though. If I thought for a second that she would feed me a bone I might consider standing, but after two years I'm afraid I'm done.
Dating helped ME when I was seperated and alone, but I really am not 100% sure it is the right choice now that I live in the house with the children again. I am torn as what to do. I have completely detached from the outcome of our marriage, although I still do think about the pain sometimes and the loss of family. I am on the mindeset to divorce because I have had no other action from her to say otherwise. It's still odd though that we can interact in such a normal way. We can still joke. I got the I love you but not in love (lust) with you speech two years ago. Nothing has changed. She is still not attracted to me and now I'm not really attracted to her.
Ugh. This ride has been horrible, but emotionally letting go of the outcome and starting to do things for myself has helped emmensely.
