"Sorry, I'm not comfortable being intimate with someone committed to ending our marriage. It seems inappropriate."
That will lead to nothing good if you say that. It sounds so.......well, a lot of things, but it will not be near as affective as just giving her that "I know what you are doing, and I am not the least bit interested" look.
The LBH does not need to find every little opportunity to throw "words" around. It comes across as being "Mr. Goody-Two-Shoes", preachy, and at best....self pity. Remember that the non-words work better. "Show" her....don't talk her to death.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
