Thanks for you response. I know it is crazy thinking but when someone has betrayed you like this, like we all know, you start to suspect everything. i know on his web history things came up though, is that how your web history is.
I think you are getting more delusional...sorry, but your actions are very out of wack even for a LBS! Maybe it is the Alkasezer and the meds...but you are bouncing like superball in a concrete room!
Get off the computer, stop snooping, you can't really know what HIS history says when you are not on his computer...sorry, my H is a computer specialist and he said NO WAY unless you are hacking and he doubts that most lay persons can do what you are claiming...
Breath, eat, sleep, see your doctor, and quit quit quit snooping...you are just confirming to him that he made the right decision to leave and quite frankly I would not recommend him to come home YOU as you are right now!
My head is spinning just reading your posts. So many great people posting to you including Mr. Bond and you ignore everything. We have all been where you have been. We have all done foolish things but most of us make the mistake once and move on. You keep making the same mistakes again and again. You are only making yourself feel worse. You say your sons grades are slipping this is NOT just because your h left. You can fix this.
My h left when my youngest of 2 was one year old. He had multiple ows. I am a full time student and my children are straight A students. My oldest is a talented singer and my youngest is an excellent athlete. This is not because I sat around feeling sorry for myself. When I had a bad day and there were many I did not show them. I found other coping mechanisms including posting here.
I am telling you this so you can understand that you are not the only one going through this. Don't you get it. Everyone has a heart breaking story many worse than yours. You are allowed to have a pity party once in awhile but you need to stop it and them move on. You have to. Your h is on a long journey, This could take many years. You are not invited on his journey. Are you going to spend the whole time reading his search history and wondering what he is doing with OW? You only have one life to live. YOU have the be the sane parent for your son. He needs you. Your h cannot be there.
