reconciliation after divorce?

[FindingMyVoice]

Wow, that's amazing. How did you get her to open up?

I told her that the trust issue goes both ways, and that I thought it was very important for us to try to rebuild our trust, even if we are going our separate ways.

Good for you for asserting yourself regarding the trust, and for stating your needs so clearly.

She told me that it was clear to her that my emotional needs had been being met by others over the past number of years, and that she was unable to meet my emotional needs no matter how hard she tried.

I obviously don't know your sitch to that extent, but that sounds like a distorted thought to me. Your MC might be able to help her see and reframe that perception.

Probably went too far in criticizing him in front of her, but so be it.

Yup - good for you again. You have a right to speak your mind no matter how she responds to it.

She agreed to go the MC next week to talk over some of these issues. She is doing it more for me than for herself. I think we need to talk about reestablishing trust, and about the fact that I have not been a liar throughout our relationship. I think we need to talk about our communication issues. I think we need to talk about the fact that we can meet each others emotional needs. I have no idea how far to take this conversation, but I need to be careful. I think it is a conversation we need to have.

Wow - that all sounds positive. I'm happy and surprised to hear that she's willing to go to MC. And it doesn't matter that she says she's doing it more for you than herself. Like my IC said, the reason 'why' they'll go is much less important than the fact that they'll go.

I think your MC will be able to help you keep the conversation from becoming detrimental to your state of mind. I haven't heard you say anything adverse about your MC; I'm gathering you're happy with her? She's offering you good guidance and she's showing respect for your W even though she's not there? As long as you've been happy with her guidance so far, I don't think you're screwing things up at all! Anything that enables us to better communicate our position from a place of integrity, respect and full consciousness, and understand another person's frame of reference, can only be a beneficial thing. I bet you'll both get a lot out of it.

Take care! Thinking of you!