I think this is my home for the next 6 months...

[ericmsant2]

Shelbel

I am sorry to read about your sitch. If the MLC stuff you have read describes your H to a T then you are in the right place.

A few things that I suggest you do..someone will probably send you links to a ton of MLC info. Read it. Re read it and then re Read it again.

I am still trying to understand that this has nothing to do with me

This is going to take time but trust me this really has nothing to do with you and everything to do with him. What YOU do for YOU though is key.

still feel like he'd be happier if I'd done something differently

He probably doesn't know what he feels right now but quess what...that should not matter to you. Everyone is going to tell you to FOCUS on YOU. Please listen to that advice.

I don't think that this M can be saved,

Probably not the attitude to have at this point. R u sure you really feel that way - think about it and let me know.

but I'm not going to turn into that crazy stbxw. I want to be able to handle this with all the dignity I can muster.

Sound good but it also sounds like you are defeated already.

I'm trying to save myself now.

YES! This is a good mindset to have - very good.

Any advice, and I do mean ANY, will be appreciated.

A couple of comments...
1) I am not nor are many of us professional therapist so realize that what I am giving you is my opinion.
2) Every MLC scenarios is different so some of the advice you recieve may not apply. You will need to sift through the advice you get and figure out what is really applicable to you.
3) This forum is a great place to "vent" and chat with people that are in similar spots.
4) Take you time when reading the advice. Really think about what people are saying...open yourself up. For me personally, these boards have been a life changing experience. It could happen to you but you really need to open up and explore yourself.

God Bless,
Eric