Well, you're married until you're divorced in my opinion, so I would (and did) keep wearing that ring until then. Despite "the law" nowadays in most states, simply walking out on the family doesn't give one the right to date or end the marriage in the eyes of God.
My biggest regret about the 'other man' thing ten years after my divorce, is not whuppin the other guys ass, or at least not making him as miserable as possible. To my credit, I did take the sleazeballs tires out on his car with my knife while he was standing right there watching. Thought I'd regret that later . . .well, it's been ten years . . . still not regretting it yet. In that case, I didn't have to worry too much about him calling the police, as he had issues, similar to your 'problem man' and was likely more worried about the cops than I was. I'd have likely done it anyway, truth be told.
My ex has even mentioned, though it was well after the divorce and after she dumped that clown, that she actually found that was strangely attractive. On the down side, she also said it made her madder at me because she didn't want to be attracted to me at the time. Go figure?
Life may be short, but . . . well . . . it actually IS short, now that I think about it . . . . particularly when compared to planetary formation and stuff.
