Husband left me 3 months pregnant...

[newmama]

BD you know something...being genuine versus manipulative seems like the right thing to do and the easy thing, too. What I mean is (and I am summarizing your actions here) if you want to include him, and you want him to go to the classes, then I guess by inviting him, then you are showing that. If you didn't want him to go but invited him because you were trying to get him to bond with you through the baby, that would be wrong. Or if you wanted him to go but didn't invite him because you hoped it would send a message, it would be wrong because it could hurt more than help....so I think you are going about this the right way!

After all, if in the future you get fed up with something, you can genuinely request changes and space at that time! right???

yeah- sharing the responsibility can be annoying too because it means we have to compromise with another person's view of how to raise our child! However, I bet like you all, one of the reasons I married my WH is that we both agree on 99% of child rearing issues (that we could think of- I am not naive!) So far I think we have been able to do this co parenting smoothly because we are thinking of S and we agree with each other on decisions.