How much longer in Separated?

[jon2911]

The weekend was very fun. We really enjoyed checking out the small college town, had some great food, hit a couple parks with her dog and even found an azalea garden on the college campus. It was incredible. The hotel was only 6 months old and very nice.

We relaxed and watched several episodes of Grey's Anatomy, Private Practice and Modern Family on the ABC app on my iPad. Also helped set up W's netbook, more on that later.

The second night, we had champagne and W was wearing a new nighty she bought for the weekend. She was driving me crazy. We watched some shows, and I could tell she was feeling strange. She was searching for side effects for a new medicine. More in a minute...

[jon2911]

Trying to get tax extension in today, and as much done as possible. Much to update on, hopefully will have time tomorrow.

[MichelleLT]

Waiting with bated breath...LOL

[Goodfight]

Jon,

Things are really going well for you now. I'm really happy for you and you give me hope. We haven't been in touch lately and was wondering if you could give me some input on my sitch when you get a chance.

[jon2911]

GF,
Lots to update on here, post a link and I'll check your thread. Apologies, lost where you were. You're in MLC now right?

Had a good visit with W after my last update, and then 2 weeks later. Shooting for seeing her every 2 weeks.

Lots of little bright spots happening. I still have no control over what she does down there, but we're talking every night, and we have plans for Memorial Day.

I've been really struggling at work, and need to vent more about that here instead of to W. She does listen though, and a couple weeks ago I shared with her some frustrations at work, and she told me some trouble she's having with FIL. He blasted her for not calling enough, after 45 minutes she said "Dad, I've got to go" and hung up. The next day she got a full page e-mail with bullet points. She hasn't responded to him, and hasn't really talked to him for a couple weeks. She was supposed to go for Mother's Day, but got what she called an "ice pick headache" the night before and was up all night. I got to talk to her for a while. There's a definite connection there, and also with how well our relationship is doing. Whenever she and FIL have a fight I notice a big difference.

It's been very hard not seeing her, but she's had a lot of drama with the grandparents. A refrigerator went out at their vacation ranch, and they arrived to find spoiled deer meat and blood all over the floor. Yuck. BIL loves to hunt. They had to return this weekend and completely re-tile the floor, and then SIL is coming in from New York for the next two weekends. Memorial Day is after that.

W is exhausted and VERY tired of her family. Which is usually good for me

[MichelleLT]

Haha. Just be careful not to rescue her too much. It's all good to be the stable and loving one in her life. But let her fend for herself enough to feel and be independent and self-confident too.

Glad things are going well!!!!!!!!!

[jon2911]

Another interesting development:
W and I were talking about my apartment, I'm going to get settled in the entire top story because the management hasn't told me anything. I basically have a 3 bed 2 bath place now, so we were talking about which room I should live in, which should be the guest bathroom, etc. My mom and brother are coming up this weekend to help move things around.

W said "I would feel uncomfortable sleeping in the room right by the back door". Then she caught herself, said "I mean, if I were there".

I'm pushing hard for a promotion in the next week or so at work, going well. Also worked out this morning and ate better this week, makes a world of difference.

[jon2911]

Haha. Just be careful not to rescue her too much. It's all good to be the stable and loving one in her life. But let her fend for herself enough to feel and be independent and self-confident too.

Good words.

[MichelleLT]

Haha. Interesting slip!

Sounds like she's feeling pretty comfortable there and with you. Definitely a nice positive

[jon2911]

Continued progress over the last month and a half, we've been able to meet somewhere every other weekend consistently, talking every night. I'm frustrated sometimes when friends want an update, with major news or something. However, a good friend recently took me to lunch and asked "well, when you do spend time together, is there any awkwardness, like a wall between you, or is it natural?"

I realized that I'd definitely say natural, just like we're dating again. He said that's huge news, and exactly what he's been praying for specifically. How cool. Great to have some outside perspective.

We talked until 10:30 last night, and then went to bed. Here's the text I found this morning at 1:30 AM

"Grandma had a stroke. At the ER now. God this looks bad."

Wow. I had mixed emotions driving to work, on the one had wishing I could be with her, frustrated because I couldn't get ahold of her. Just after pulling into work:

SIL is coming in tonight at 10:00, after that they'll take her off of life support. Please say a prayer for her when you get a change, I love you

I responded "I love you too. I'll be here whenever you can call"

I finally got her on the phone at 11:30 AM, and she told me more details. I told her I wanted to come in, and she said that's unnecessary and she'll be busy with either funeral plans or the funeral itself. I knew that, but was hoping she'd want me to come.

So, interesting circumstances for the first L-Bombs in a year and a half. I want to be there for her however she needs me to. We had plans for the 4th, but my family wants me to come there also so I have a backup. Feeling very torn today, I was very close to her grandparents and really hoped to see them before something like this happened. But it's not about my feelings right now and I need to remember that.

Hoping to catch up on everyone's threads now!