OIN has already stated previously that his wife, prior to the bomb, was very communicative. She is choosing to engage him verbally in a disrespectful, passive aggressive way. And he's allowing it. While its true that it was wrong for OIN to treat his wife poorly, to say hurtful and belittling things to her prior to the bomb, she shares some of the responsibility because healthy people with healthy boundaries don't let people treat them poorly.
The only difference now is that they have switched roles. It didn't work for her to be a doormat for him and it isn't going to work for him either. I'm not suggesting being rude or aggressive, I very much like the way Lotus describes setting that boundary.
I also think, even though it may be counterproductive, its time to ask her if its still her intention to move out when the other apartment is ready. At least then you'll have a solid barometer of whether what you're doing is actually helping or if its time to switch tactics.
Just my humble opinion. Either way I am impressed with the changes you have made and the effort you have put in to save your marriage.
