I hope you are feeling better. I just read a few of the last postings on this thread and it sounds like you are going through the hard struggle as most of us are or did.
I would suggest that you maybe take a short vacation. Or just go to a friends house and say your gonna take a mini vacation and just spend some time away.
I can feel your frustrations coming through in your words - I can remember being there and feeling like the whole thing would never end. I feel much better now. there is hope.
My friends would force me to still go on our vacations that MY H and I had planned on doing together and with those groups of friends. These big combined trips happened twice while he was away for the year. I would go with our group of friends and he would not be invited along.
It was hard to go away. But I really needed it. I forced myself to try and look like I was having fun when I really was dying inside. My friends were supportive.
ANYWAY, the point is that both times I went on little breaks or vacations - my H would get really curious and jealous, and when I would get home he would want to actually spend time with me to make sure he didnt miss out on too much. It scared him to see that my life was not standing still. He hated to see me look like I was moving on too fast and far with out him.
The best thing to do in this MLC situation is to Focus on making YOU happy and healthy too.
The MLC hate is so hard to deal with, it was actually making me feel hatred towards my H. So I also decided to start myself a journal in which every day I would write down the negatives (thoughts and things that happened) and the positives from each day. As the year went on, I could definetly see a difference in the size of the negatives getting smaller than the size of the positives column. Meaning, I was getting stronger and dealing with MLC crap better as the year went on and it showed me there can be a brighter tommorow.
I want you to know that my H and I are back together and very happy. We struggeled a lot to get where we are, but we are both proud of the work we put forth to make the reconciliation possible. The MLC crap slowly wears off as they wake up. It does not happen over night. Hang in there. TIPPER
