Have been following your advice, True Gritter, and I see her somewhat "turning" toward me a bit more as a result...starting to disconnect a little bit and, as a result, do feel a bit more "in my own skin" and starting to realize a bit more how unhealthy our typical "patterns" are.
Am not talking about the R/MC and really leaving her be as much as possible. Next 2 weeks for her is very busy (not only her regular job, but a twice-yearly show that is even bigger is on May 24) - so her head certainly isn't in anything related to "us" but just surviving this rush (so know she doesn't need my "pressure")...
Mother's Day was OK, but had a little fight over something really stupid - she had wanted to leave at a certain time and we were 20 minutes late (because she was on the computer) - me and the kids were literally waiting in the car for her for over 10 of those 20 minutes - I mentioned (when she complained that we hadn't left on time) that we had been waiting and she got pretty mad about it (have no idea how she could blame anyone but herself), but, in the spirit of MDay and not wanting to ruin it, "fell on my sword" and apologized for saying anything (which I regreted later in the day, as I hadn't done anything "wrong")!
Started to bug me that she couldn't even admit the reason we were late (not in the scheme of things it really made a difference either way and wasn't a big deal) - just made me realize how she can sometimes blow pretty small things out of proportion.
Am planning to see our MC by myself again this week and don't plan to even mention it to her this week (though it is on our family calendar).
Agree overall that all of her "detachment" has been concerning to me, as I feel like I'm attempting to do all the work here (and that maybe this stepping back will make her feel like she has to start herself).
Will keep you posted on progress (or lack thereof)! Patience, patience, patience...
