The nature of message boards (or any conversation really) is sort of an organic progression of ideas that veer off the main topic.

Ever ask a friend about the weather and the next thing you know you are reminiscing about the perfect game David Wells pitched when he was hung over as hell? Would you be upset because your friend didn't just answer your question about the weather?

I asked you a question, you answered so I asked more questions. I am not sure why the answer to me had to contain jabs at other people. I stand by what I said.. you do seem a bit controlling. I also know how it feels to have no control and you (general you) are reaching for *something*.

I forget the exact statistic but I think it is around 60%... 60% of issues between two spouses will never be "solved" (in your case the friend issue, it may or may not be solved) but if two spouses communicate in a healthy way you both can find middle ground w/o a firm solution.

I guess I would ask what would be the middle ground between you and your W regarding the friend issue?

In your last post there is an awful lot of speculating about what your W is thinking. You are correct, the article may have not caused one bit of damage. It might have caused damage and she just doesn't feel like going round and round with you again. The bottom line is we DON'T know. Sometimes you just have to go with the popular opinion when you are unsure. And it seems, based on my own experience of being in C'ing, an "in person" divorce support group and two online forums that the WAS is not receptive to reading materials. IMO you are just walking on the side of caution.

Sometimes providing more information about other issues actually can help the issue you are so concerned with (in this case the friend issue). You said yourself that you don't understand menopause. How could you? As a man you will not have the experience of having your body change the way a woman's body changes. Heck, it will be at least another 25 years before I understand it. Maybe you are giving your W what you think is good support but it's just not right for her so she is turning to a woman friend.

There are millions of scenarios. IMO there is merit and great benefit to talking about many issues as it it might provide insight to the issue you are really concerned with.