why do i feel like those boundaries are not mine to set?
The boundaries are for when he tries to blame you or make something your problem that is his.
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i can do all of the right things but will i ever get my bf back?
To quote Bob Dylan, "The answer my friend is blowing in the wind, the answer is blowing in the wind."
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is there ever a way to turn an ILYBINILWY into a ILY again?
Absolutely.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.