I think you need to do some working from home. I think you also need to take some sundays at home...
I am wondering what these church officials are "saying" to OM, because he's insulting the church too if he's ignoring them.
These officials don't care as long as it's kept quiet.
I think if you told these officals you will be exposing this affair to the entire church AND that you will be making people aware that the church condones the affair might wake them up a bit.
I have seen this before where the officals don't want to stir the pot or experience any embarassment, so they make it look like they are helping you but they really are just trying to avoid a scene.
I say give them a scene to show them you aren't going to tolerate their softball tactics. I would sit with them and insist them meet YOU and OM BOTH TOGETHER in private and settle it then and there.
These officials don't care about your marriage Ken, they care about their own reputation... THAT is your leverage there... As long as the infidelity is kept quiet and your divorce is quiet they will be quite happy with it... They want to avoid a scandal and gossip mainly... they are far less concerned about the fate of your marriage. That's just the reality of it.
I would hit these officials hard. I would tell them if they aren't going to DO something about this then you will be exposing the affair to the church AND will be informing everyone how the church turns a blind eye to this sort of thing and how dissappointed you are. I really don't think these guys are on your corner here... even if you think they may be.
If I were you I would be making a scene where the OM frequents... I would have a script ready and confront OM in public and keep doing it. Take some friends of yours with you too...
Keep researching the law. You may be able to get the police involved if the info you have is accurate... You will need to learn more first... keep on that.
