Gatsby, your post made me laugh... even you now have expectations for him! I am cautious, and at the end of the day just remind myself, that He still THINKS he doesnt love me, may never love me, but I am not arguing or putting him down for leaving me and am moving forward.
My Changes:
-being more positive -always looking my best! -being more confident -GAL (and letting H know a few things like friends I've gone to dinner with or what I am doing all on my own, etc.) -Being kind, no more arguments. -Stop insults or accusations as to why he left.
Here is how I look at it. If my H sees me crying and moping and sad and negative, he will think he made the right decision and reconfirm that he truly isnt in love with me anymore. If I am happy, and positive and glowing, with a little bit of mystery, then H seems to be curious and comes forward. I put my swords and guards down and ever since I did, H has responded differently. I realized that DBing does not mean attack, which is what i was doing, but instead to distance and be the best.
i end up feeling better about myself, and notice that H is more comfortable around me too.
Maybe its cake eating... maybe its the "friendship" that serves as the foundation of reconciling... I will never know unless I try it out.
in the meanwhile, I am not as stressed or angry. yes, i still get sad, when I realize he is not around, but not angry where i start hating him. I realized i was changing who i was because of what he did!
