Okay...now I know why you told me to look my best whenever I see H. I picked up the kids tonight and he looked like hell!! I don't think he's shaved since he left. Beyond scruffy--scraggly is more the word I'd use.
The earlier convo we'd had ticked me off. I'm making my first boundary; no cussing at me, and no being mean. It was an issue when he was here & I'd asked him to stop. Now I am putting it in stone. I do not talk to him like that. I wouldn't accept it from anyone else, and I don't deserve it. I won't tell him that I'm not going to tolerate it, I will just simply end the conversation. If he asks me why, then I'll be more than happy to tell him. But a few times of saying "goodbye" and hanging up after he's dropped the F Bomb at me & he'll figure it out.
I had to call him back to ask him to remember to bring ALL of their clothes home (including everything from last weekend), and I didn't even ask to speak to him. I asked for my MIL. I have no desire to give him another opportunity to berate me.
As the kids were getting into my car H mentioned that I'd have to go up tot he attic and get the rocket from last year for the Boy Scout rocket launch this weekend for S8. I sent this year's rocket with him so he & H could build it together. H managed to lose it. So now I have to go up to the rafters & root around all the junk that he scattered when he moved out. I will make an honest effort, but I'm not going to kill myself to find it. H lost it, if S8 doesn't get to go to the launch because of that, then I am sorry. I'm not going to bail his butt every time he screws up.
He just stood by my car as I was buckling the kids in. All of a sudden he says, "Okay then. (pause) Well. Bye." He got in the van & drove away. I hadn't seen the two older ones since Thursday, was I supposed to fall all over myself to talk to the man who'd just asked me what my effin problem was a few hours earlier?
Whatever, I will not make him a priority when he can't even afford to treat me with some common decency.
Get used to it, H. I miss you, I love you, I honestly feel bad for what I put you through. But there is no way I'm letting you do this to me. I can miss you & love you from here.
I'm surprised at just how quickly I can change my mind about him.
formerly known as "shelbel" Me 40, stbxh 40 DSs 9, 7 & 3 M9, T10 Stbxh is a diagnosed bipolar & an addict. The end.
