OK so I find it interesting how your H is showing excitement about the baby but is ambiguous about being there for the birth or shortly after. Have you ever considered it could do with OW not wanting him to be there- or that he feels like it wouldn't be fair to her? Not that you could do anything about it but it is just strange how he won't commit to meeting his daughter!
Mmm. One thing is for sure, H is committed to at least meeting his child. His wishes are to be called when I am in labour and wait in another room and come in post delivery. Meeting her is the reason, he tells me,he is in the country (the other reason he says he came back was to tell me what had happened and to make his final decision about us, which he did in Feb).
As for post birth, H can't say where he'll be, primarily because he's not found stable employment here (he's been trying), so setting up here independently is really tricky (if he's separated from me and our resources). Plus there is the problem of OW - can he bring her here, will he be able to leave child to be with her overseas...?....Don't thnk he knows the answers yet.
As for the birth, he told me he doesn't talk to OW about it (like I just posted to JacT though, is that even possible?? Must be one hell of an elephant in the room !). I think she won't be putting pressure on him (knowing her), I tink it's more likely my husband being sentimentally loyal to HER now, not me. He told me he had "given his heart to her" and that he doesn't want to be in an intimate setting (birthroom) with me because it's not the relationship we have anymore. He is also afraid of being confronted, I think and is still remedial and detatched about this whole 'having a baby thing'.
Read Old Pilot's post on MLCers coming out of the fog... When my H announces his A over, then we have a starting point.... My H is capable of letting me think the A is still going on when it's falgging because it's his way of making a point - that our M is dead in the water with or without his A. Possible script, possibly true.
Me 36; H 40 baby born in May M:13, T:15 Bomb (OW): Dec 09 began DBing: Feb WH overseas with OW old: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2027369#Post2027369
