My W spent twenty years growing up in a family where Dad was having an A and her Mom knew about it. Of course, Mom spent a lot of time trying to turn the kids against Dad. It was an incredibly bitter place to grow up. That's why I never thought she'd ever do what she did after having experienced the pain she did growing up but I was wrong. I guess you repeat what you learned. I once said to her "If you want to live like your Dad then go ahead, but I won't live like your friggin' Mom" and I didn't, I left.
