I walked away a month ago with my 23 months old son and am staying over friends 800km far and now my life is rolling down and I cannot see the end of it. Help me!!!
My husband and I have had lots of discordances lately. Last time I got mad and left was because he had organized a party inviting everyone, including his mother, at the house his ex-wife had rented, and he told me that just an evening before just to tell me he would like to have our son over also. It was Easter and his other kids had come on vacation (2 kids from previous marriage leaving 1200km far from us). I said not only NO, but packed and left. I felt so small and stupid I had to leave.
My friend who lives 860 km away sheltered us ever since. My MIL through me out of her apartment when I was 6 months pregnant after she called me names and wanted to hit me, in the middle of the night. There was never a discussion between us, she is schizophrenic. I never forgive her, I couldn’t. I expected my H to take a position he never did. I expected that because this so called mother left him and his sister for another man at that time and they got scorbutic because had nothing to eat and couldn’t. I have appreciated always the fact his ex has been discrete and never disturbed our private life and that she has never crossed any borders but we are not friends and cannot be a big family and I know he did it on purpose to hurt me. I was the 100th time I got the impression he doesn’t have Principe and accused him of missing them. My H is a survival and those don’t have Principe so any use to tell them and make them think about them. I come from a solid family where values are still taught. Anyways.
I moved out. In the mean time we had some discussions over mail. I understood he was angry but still had hoped he would think over and come against all that for his family. No use to say that wasn’t an option. I asked him to call often the baby as he was suffering. He then came over last w-e to see the baby and I tried to talk to him. There was sth wrong I couldn’t name. He became hysteric when I tried to talk again and so he left afterwards. When he left I went back to the apartment to pick up the rest of the docs and to hand in some administrative files I was obliged to. I found the lock of the door changed. I filed a police report and they told me I could open the door (force the opening) as that was still our house. I did it, I found the force in me to do it, and when I entered, I found all my personal belongings had been removed but not the furniture for which I paid. I was completely shocked but cold. I picked up some stuff for the baby, than left a post-note-it in almost all big furniture naming it was mine and left. I went again at the police station and reported the removal of my stuff. They told me there wasn’t much to do since it can note be theft between the two spouses. Anyways, the next day I talked to the social assistant offered at the police stations to « victims » like me. She told me there were other reports by him on me.
I left the city and the country and went back to my child. I sent him a mail informing I had forced, as the law suggests, the opening of the door and that I hoped one day, he had the guts to explain he had closed the door to us sth the child « had to value » and that’s it. I was shocked to learn he had filed a police report on me and that he had seen a divorce lawyer already and that he had removed all my stuff and put them in his sister’s garage without telling me. I am always under shock since I don’t see much of reasons to come to this point. Of course there is, he didn’t respect me or trusted me enough but that is because of his previous life, not mine. I am so confused I had to do with such a manipulative person and had no clue. I feel so bed I will be connected forever with someone like him because of the child.
Please give me some advice, how is this going to end?
