I'm learning that, C-Bart. I also feel that since part of the reason for our sitch is the lack of security she felt in my ability to provide for the family after my business hit its downturn. Putting myself in a position of "need" for spousal equity may re-enforce those feelings and be a set back toward any type of R. That's why I would be asking the L to make it rehabilitative ... temporary while I re-build my career. Her income was supposed to have brought us through this rough patch until I was back in position to provide fully again, allowing her the option of staying at home with kids again and /or work a more flexible schedule.
