MWD talks alot about how relationships are like seesaws. One person is often overinvesting in the relationship while the other then can underinvest. The goal is balance or close to balance.
By being in panic mode you are severely overinvested. To the point that you are analyzing everything that is said or done right down to the minute details. Do you think your wife is doing that too? Of course, she isn't.
I understand that you want to save your marriage but you are acting from fear and a position of weakness. Don't. That will not save your relationship. Detach, GAL, be strong. Listen to the great advice from Puppy, Gucci, Robx, Steve, Coach, and the other vets.
