Doc, Jak, Matilda, Naej, and DB Friends, I've ordered library copies of Boundaries in Marriage by Henry Cloud, and The Art of Forgiving by Lewis Smedes. I'm looking for assistance in learning to how to be more assertive in my marriage, and how to better manage the serious boundary violations my W has done, and be prepared for the next time. I'm hoping the boundaries book will have the blend of compassion I'm looking for combined with a tough love approach I need to grow into, as recommended by peers repeatedly on this board. I've been thinking about reading this book for some time.
I've ordered the Art of Forgiving to help me deal with the emotional part of all the pain my W has inflicted over the years, embarrassment I have for myself and my M, anger I have towards my W and those who have disrespected me and my M, frustration, disappointment, and other emotions that will hinder healing, unless I process and transform them.
I'll keep working thru Mars @ Venus by John Gray, as it has been helpful already in helping me to understand gender differences. I think the three books will complement each other.
I've been unbalanced these past two weeks, but emotions are starting to settle. It's become clear what I need to learn, and how I need to grow.
CL
CL 53 W 54 M 20 yrs. 03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL 10-14' Piecing
"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."
