Yes, I understand that it MIGHT as well be snoop but not necessarily has to be. My W tends to be someone who wears her heart and thoughts on her sleeve. I think I know her fairly well and while I am always aware that one day I could wake up and realize that she's a totally different person than I thought, for now I'm going with "I know her". That means I can learn a LOT from simple observation. If I can refrain from constantly talking to her about all this, I can probably tell a lot more about what's going on.
GH,
Just throwing this out there randomly, as this thought JUST occurred to me:
I wonder if you wouldn't be better off with some regular system of intel, but one that you only checked, say, ONCE PER MONTH, and then TOTALLY BACK OFF OF HER on a day-to-day basis, than you are the way you're doing it now.
Cuz here's the thought that flashed to me as I read your post just now: I think that what looks to you like this "power of observation," looks to your wife like "OMG, he's CONSTANTLY watching and scrutinizing and questioning my every move! He's SMOTHERING ME!!!!
Ask the women on here, but I guaran-damn-tee you that they can pick up on this sort of a vibe, whereas us DAMs tend to think we're just being ohh-so-shrewd, kwim???
Just a thought, but I wonder if you wouldn't actually be LESS "snooping" if you did something regularly, but far less frequently.
