I kept pressure on her, I was tough in our legal mediations, I made it crystal clear that I'd never let her take our kids to OM's country, and I showed her that I would not allow the artifacts from her trips to be in my house. I refused to normalize her A, which drove her nuts. She normalized it within her inner circle of friends, who were giggly with interest over her stories of passion, but me, my family, my friends, one key friend of hers, and most of her family would not accept her A as "ok". All of this I think contributed to the death of the A to some degree. I did what I could to make sure her reality was nowhere near the fantasy of how she thought it would go.
Correct, and don't get defensive -- if you'll look upthread, you'll see where we're telling you that you DID do things the right way, and THAT'S WHEN/WHY SHE RESPONDED TO YOU.
We're just trying to get you to keep up the pressure and healthy skepticism, that's all.
