According to what HB has shared with me, this is very common for the MLCer to do when they start coming through the tunnel. Snodderly has written on it and so has HB.
Expect this to happen. Reread the information about withdrawal because it does show different signs in there of them still being secretive and the whole nine yards.
She expresses about being very patient during this time and being very careful about what you say because a wrong word at any time can send them back.
When they break withdrawal, that is when they will tell you everything. She also explains that in this withdrawal stage there is anger but it is at themselves, but they will take it out on you. There is also depression and they do the back and forth thing.
This is going to take them some time to get through all of this. Right now, you need to ask the Lord to help you with the trust factor because it is an issue with you with good reason. I know that it is an issue with everyone that goes through this.
If you have ordered the book from Rejoice Ministries that talks about When Prodigals Return, it goes through much of this. It explains things from the Prodigals point of view and from the LBS's point of view. It will teach you how to deal with these situations for now.
Just because they are reconnecting or back home, does not mean that this is over. This is a whole new ball game because this is where the marriage is going to make it or it is not.
Keep staying on your path and working on yourself and allowing the Lord to make the changes in you and in your spouse to get you through this time. Keep the patience and keep the anger at bay. You do have issues of your own that you are now going to have to work on and allow the Lord to heal you.
Remember, you have been working on changing yourself and growing in order for your spouse to come home and now you are going to have to work on the area of getting healed from the choices that your spouse has made that has caused all of your hurts. That takes time. That is why this is a process instead of just jumping right back into everything.
