THank you all for the support. It means more than you'll ever know. I had my last dress rehearsal for my show tonight and took my time getting home - giving friends rides to their houses. I never do this when H is here or a babysitter. I'm just full of rage at my H right now.
And it helps to hear Laura has as much of a hard time with the walking away as I do. This gives me courage to keep it up. I too want a healthy relationship and I'm reading a book about abusive men and my H fits so much of it. I"m mad at myself for not being the WAS~!
It is freeing that H isn't here but I miss my son terribly - even if he was only sleeping I feel like my arm has been ripped out of my socket.
PS I followed your advice, Kalni - I smiled and told S to have a great time and saved my tears for later. I hate lying like that.
