So my friends have been saying they want to de-friend my W on FB. I had been telling them to wait because it would make the situation worse. Well, today I have been working on letting go. I finally told my friends that if they want to, they now can. I also said that their decision has zero impact on our friendship (100% true btw).
One of my friends went a step further and sent her an email un-inviting her from a surprise party for my friends W. She told my W that she has had a really hard time watching me suffer as my W walked away, and was concerned that if she (my friend) had a few drinks then she would probably say some bad things and wanted to avoid the awkwardness. My W replied saying that my friend didn't know the whole sitch but she understood if she didn't want to be friends anymore. For the record, my friend knows the whole sitch, I don't hold back with my friends, and this particular friend of mine, has no problem telling me if I'm being stupid (which she has, on several occasions).
My W then begins calling me while I'm at work, I don't answer, it's a violation of NC. She calls again, I don't answer. The W then sends me a txt asking if I'm ignoring her for any special reason. I tell her I'm busy and ask if it's urgent, she says yes. So I reply and say please email. The W replies: "Call", and I do not call or reply. The W then calls later while I am on the bus, I do not answer. She sends a txt asking "is this how it's going to be?" I reply and say that I don't like talking while on the bus (very true and I have told her this before, ESPECIALLY for such a personal convo), I said she is probably upset b/c I didn't answer, and she has every right to be upset. And that no, this is not how it's going to be.
The W has not replied. Perhaps she will call when off work, or email. My assumption is that she is fired up over this exchange with my friend and is most likely looking to take it out on me and demand a D (out of hurt & anger). My friend could have been kinder, but that's her, she's blunt like I said.
Any advice on how I should handle this now? Our agreement (which she changed 2 weeks into the S) is decision by 6/18/10. If she says she wants a D now, not only will she be going back on our agreement again, but she has violated NC several times today.
And the main reason I told my friends this, is b/c I am letting go. I'm not making decisions just to make her happy. And to be honest, this is just a fraction of the reality of D. It has a giant blast radius! For the most part, I have been trying like crazy to make her happy, and in the process becoming insane!
