Thanks Trapt. I could not believe that she is taking this approach. I was amazed. I know that this is now ultimately about money for her.
I have instructed my L to do EVERYTHING possible to try and ensure that I can get 50% custody.
I am so pissed at myself for trying to save this M. I should have acted when the L told me to. I should have tried to have her removed from the house but I was really trying to save this. I was trying to maintain a normal home for the kids. I did not want them to be pissed at me for throwing mom out but man I feel like I should have acted sooner.
I did everything I said I would do - I paid down as much of the debt as possible, I never filed, I paid off her car, I did everthing I said I would do and now I feel like I am getting screwed. Am I am angry - yes. However, I take comfort in who I have become. Althought I have some regrets over how I dealt with this sitch early I have grown from it and that I do not regret.
I continue to remind myself that I own my part of the failure of the M.
I own some of my actions during the early part of this process.
I own my feelings.
I own my LIFE - It is mine to live, to learn and to grow.
I feel crappy but I am not defeated! Lost once said to me...be the change that you want to be in the world....you were right Lost...you were right. I will be this change. I will be a MAN!
Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
I am so pissed at myself for trying to save this M. I should have acted when the L told me to. I should have tried to have her removed from the house but I was really trying to save this. I was trying to maintain a normal home for the kids. I did not want them to be pissed at me for throwing mom out but man I feel like I should have acI continue to remind myself that I own my part of the failure of the M. ted sooner
This was all part of the process. If you had done it differently it wouldn't be you. You wouldn't have gotten here the way you did.
Quote:
I take comfort in who I have become.
Yes to this!
Man you can't look back at this and go I shoulda woulda coulda. That is Monday morning quarterbacking!
You got here the way you got here the point is you're here!
You ARE the MAN!
My goal is to some day be the person my dog thinks I am
Dont be mad at yourself about the past. You did what was necessary at the time to try and save your M. If you went on the offensive at the time, I dont think things would turn out different in the final D judgement.
Just from my experience, work on custody issues and a parenting plan first before the money matters.
I do hope that the state of Conneticut is not as messed up in family law as its neighbor state to the south.
Mach - "You couldn't have handled "ending" it then, and you know it."
Ouch - but your right. I could not have handled it - could not.
Thanks True - have to say that going thru this process is well let just say a true test of oneself.
Kerry - Yes I have asked my L to focus first on the custody issues. The state of CT is not the greatest buddy but this is out of my control so I'll do what I can.
Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
Eric - Keep fighting for what you know is right. Thank you so much for your support in my sitch.. just wanted to return the support.
Thinking of you. Take Care.
OLD THREAD-http://tinyurl.com/y98nuty Me 44 H 51 T 15 yrs M 9+ yrs No Kids "You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment unless you trust enough."
Hi Eric, just catching up on your tread. I'm sorry that you have to go through this Are you saying that W wants 100% custody? That doesn't seem reasonable, unless she has a valid reason, hopeful the judge will do what's good for the kids. And sometimes the lawyers go for the kill, they start out asking for the moon, it gives them negotiating room. It's sick that they use kids as bargaining chip.
Also I was under the impression that kids over certain age...I think it's 14, could choose which parent they want to live with. Is it like that in your state?
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
