Part of me says she is trying to say goodbye. Part of me says she is very sad at the place we are. Part of me says she is having a hard time letting me go.
Well, I think you said it quite well actually. She's confused. In my opinion, I think that's what causes the whole push-pull dynamic thing WAs seem to create. And the only way she's going to work through those confusing feelings is to feel them, on her own. To experience them fully so that she can learn from them. Let me tell you, I've been so close to being a WAW in the last four months and that's what I'm feeling. So, so confused. Like you've seen in my thread I'm angry one day, berating myself the next, feeling abandoned and misunderstood, then riding high on confidence... the whole nine yards.
BUT. I think you're doing exactly the right thing - you CAN'T let yourself get sucked into that whirlpool of emotion she's having. I'm so afraid you'll end up manipulated, maybe not that she'd do it maliciously, but that her 'whirling' would blindside you in your efforts to stand by her. Focus on getting support for yourself instead, if you can. I'm so glad you've got lots of friends to support you right now. It sounds like you could use a good guys night out to help keep your mind off things.
I know how worried you are... you're a good, kind husband and I'm sorry you're going through such struggles. I think though, the best way to help her, is to trust in her. I know that might be counter-intuitive, but remember that she's a grown woman - she's got the resources to sort out the 'question marks' in her life and to learn confidence in herself, she's got to realize she can sort it out... she's got to be able to conquer those demons on her own.
Yes she's cut herself off from her support system, but she CHOSE that path. And, just as important is that she can CHOOSE to open that path back up to her friends and family. But she's got to do it on her own.
And don't forget, retain the distance you need to stay balanced and healthy yourself. I don't know... I fear I'm babbling now and making things more confusing for you! Please know that I'm thinking about you my friend. (((AnyChance)))
I cannot complain for not receiving from others, that which I've never asked them for.
