Just stopping by because I, like so many others can relate to the roller coaster. Coach, and others, helped me out yesterday when I really needed it.
Quote:
In what ways do you think she will push my buttons/test resolve? How is it she would see how strong I am?
I have trouble recognizing the tests myself. What we, as LBS, think of as a setback, may be a test and a sign that we are getting through to them. According to Coach, I have failed many tests. Usually we can go back and fix our f-ups.
We have to stay strong and in control. I am getting more and more nervous the closer it gets to quitting time. I know what I need to do. It won't be easy. Then again, the past few months haven't been easy.
My W brought up S last night and the financial stuff. She wants us to take turn leaving while the other stays with the kids. That way, she doesn't have to face the reality of getting her own place, uprooting the kids and letting everyone outside of the family know what's going on. Coach said she needs me to take charge. Don't agree to it. Tell her no contact and counseling and go from there.
Anyway, the point is, listen to Coach. Period. While our marriages may not be able to be saved, the way we handle things gives us the best chance even though it may not feel like it. My stomach is in a knot right now. How much worse could it be if she left?
While I am getting used to it, I still get caught off guard by the roller coaster of ups and downs. All happy and cheerful one second, and we're thinking, maybe things are turning around, we will be okay. The next, back to the venom spitting alien.
Keep your resolve and stay strong. So hard, I know.
