It is getting easier every day to wake up and move forward.
I tell you it is so funny, before I met my H I had been divorced for three years. I was just at the point where I was so happy with my life and where I was. I had accepted that I was okay alone. That is when I met my H. I know that God put him in my life for a reason and I think ever since then I have been desperatly trying to discover that reason. I was so content, having felt that way before was a real revalation for me and now I feel so lost and fear of being alone has crippled my actions for so long. I have real abandonment issues that have only come to light thru our past MC. I wont give my life history but lets just say it has been something that has happened to me so many times that it should be easy for me by now but it is never easy. That is where the co-dependency comes in. And from what I understand it never goes away you just learn to "deal" with it and change your behavior. I started to really recognize where I would try and control situations. I sometimes feel like DBing is similar to trying to control what is happining, but I do know that these changes I have been making are good for me and not just good for the R. I will continue to study read and try to gain more knowledge about myself and my H situation. We should make a real point to pray for each other as I really do know this is key in healing. I hope to hear from more of you all. It really is helpful to "discuss".
