Working on a NEW marriage

[steady]

Also,

Relationships bring out our intimacy issues. Friendships and acquaintances don't. So a person may feel confident and worthy but then feel different when in an intimate relationship. That's where the dysfunction will show itself.

It's good you are noticing when you are being the 'old' you and ratting yourself out, but the question is, how are you going to get rid of it?

Awareness isn't enough. It's the first step. Dig down deeper...that's where you'll find it.

I'll challenge you are not as self confident and self assured as you think you are.

Study this:

BUT when I am in a relationship I do feel alot of insecurities about myself, I fear that my significant other will find someone else more attractive than me, I fear that they dont actually find me that attractive. I fear that they settled with me in some regard...

Any divorce in your family? Alcoholism? Are your parents close and intimate with each other? Do they have what you would consider an open, honest and close connection?

I think if we go down the rabbit hole we'll find it somewhere..because it does exist.