tired of trying...

[beingreal]

Thank you gr8. I'm trying to stay calm. I either want to cry or yell at him. So far I've done neither. That hes seen anyway.

I will look into that book. I will read anything at this point. Consider me a blank canvas.

Between 3 kids, working full time and trying to take care of the house there isn't a lot of time left for much else. I did go out for breakfast this morning with friends. I had fun. I need to do that more. You are right about needing to do more for myself. I stood standing in the closet looking for something to wear this morning and realized I have nothing more than old Tshirts & scrubs. There hasn't been much extra money the past few years & everything I have usually goes to take care of everyone else. I think I need to go shopping for myself as my first order of business. I really need new jeans--mine are literally just hanging off of me. So not attractive.

Another thought- man's perspective
Men feel wnated and needed when they can protect and provide for falimy. It gives them a sense of worth. Since you where the one doing those things he may have felt worthless. Again, just something to think about.

I understand this concept, but feel kind of ticked off since he's the one who forced me into the position to begin with. I picked up the slack when he dropped it (throwing those little temper tantrums & refusing to do *whatever*).

So regardless how how we got here, what am to do now? Am I to concoct some situation that I need his help with? I think I would risk getting the "Well you should have thought of that before you kicked me out!" answer again. Right now I'm trying to let him take care of himself without offering help (like money). How do I get him to help us?

It seems a little soon for that, anyway.

Man I wish I had all the answers.