In my case, we got down to business first....and that basically led us into "is this what we really want to do?".
Again, my W's answer was basically still that she wanted the divorce. In our case, she started rethinking if it was what she wanted to do AFTER the meeting. She might have had second thoughts while we were talking, but she didn't disclose them then. She spent several days thinking about our talk and then said she was ready for MC.
We are not reconciled (which I know will be a whole process in itself), but my W is not ignoring me or pushing me away.
I can not answer your question about the dating site other than what I think I would do. The only thing that comes to mind is to ask her "how it makes her feel that you would be on a dating website", but that's just my thought.
You will best show her you are OK either way by not being worried and just being conversational.
