I know this is his problem & I can't fix them. It's hard to keep remembering that, but I'm trying to reinforce it. Especially when my brain starts to wander into that "...if only he'd (fill in the blank)". I can't make him do anything.
I got the books (and the ones to come) not to figure him out, but to figure me out. I know the titles all look like I'm trying to repair, but I'm not. You won't find "How to win back your husband & completely change who he is in 30 days or less!!' on my bookshelf. (God help us if there really is such a book. I don't wanna know)
I know if I can see the bigger picture, I can figure out where he is coming from, maybe I can figure out where *I* went wrong. maybe I can figure out how to make this entire sitch less painful for our kids. Maybe I can be better prepared for whatever the future throws my way.
Maybe one day I can say all those things and not have it heart my heart, even a little.
formerly known as "shelbel" Me 40, stbxh 40 DSs 9, 7 & 3 M9, T10 Stbxh is a diagnosed bipolar & an addict. The end.
