Gucci, you do give good advice and I appreciate it and listen. I realize there are two approaches, the softer approach and the firmer approach. I know the DB talks about not continuing down cheeseless tunnels.
This is where you are mixed up and don't seem to understand and you have GM helping you be weak...
Why are you thinking that leaving her alone and not contacting her means that you are taking a "firmer" approach? Get a grip 8. She has told you she wants a divorce. She wants the house up for sale. That means she feels she wants out.
No wonder you and GM are in the position you are in. You STILL are not LISTENING to her.
ARE YOU LISTENING TO HER SILENCE?
She told you she wanted out. She changed her name. She wants the house sold. She isn't contacting you...
So. Flowers and calling with an excuse to talk IS PURSUIT. Quit denying it just because you have someon willing to go along with this charade. It is pursuit. Plain and simple. Sending flowers in this culture is known as romantic and known as showing your love in this situation.
You are not listening. The way she will feel listened to is when you show her "I GET IT, aha, I get it. You want a divorce and you don't want to be with me. Got it. I will leave you alone. I won't send you flowers and I won't find an excuse to call you."
You still want what YOU want and you still are being selfish and you and GM are trying to slant this to look as if you are being so soft and this isn't hurting you..
It IS. Every mistake you make is compounded in a crisis...
She has given you every reason to believe she wants you to let go. Give her what she wants. You need to get some backbone and man up here. You are going to be fine.
