H visited the children this evening. No communication for a week until he rang yesterday about the plans for today as he picks the kids up. The kids hadn't heard from him either except D19. She text him on Saturday to say she is having her wisdom teeth out tomorrow. She had one text back to acknowledge hers.
He wasn't quite as animated as last week def depressed today but not overwhelmingly so. I think he has been away with the scouring pad hence the non communication and guilt in taking us all out for a meal. He is also taking the kids to the pictures on Sunday before our meal out and invited me! Woh big positIve............He parked his van on the drive again (more positive). He cooked supper and apologised for not helping with the washing up (another positive). He also stood so close he touched me on the arm again.
Bizzarely I have had an odd week. The non communication has really helped me detach from him. I really do feel detached. Today when he asked me to go to the cinema there was no heart pounding no anticipation just a feeling of 'thank you for asking'. Normally I would have been soooo pleased. If he doesn't buy me a ticket I won't mind. Boy this is an odd feeling.
I have travelled a long way on my journey since H left on his.When H left tonight he stood half in and half out of the door in the kitchen. I could feel his confusion because I think he sensed a change in me even though I have done my best to DB I actually think I did it right tonight. Even coming from work I wasn't nervous about him being here.
Long may this detached positive feeling last. Its very empowering!
