Well, if this happened in your first marriage then it seems you would have some experience under your belt to deal with it in your second marriage.
What would you have done the first time around? And why aren't you doing it now if the advice you are getting here is not suitable to you?
Nobody is suggestion you follow anybody or any concept blindly but there comes a time when one has to accept there are certain things out of their control. And your W talking with her friends (which says to me she is looking for validation on her decision to leave you which also says to me she is unsure about her decision) how can you stop it? IMO you cannot.
The next time she mentions talking with her friends put a big smile on your face and say "that is wonderful W, I am so glad you have people to talk to" and go about your business.
Honestly, if this has been a problem (granted, not the sole issue) in two marriages perhaps you have to try and figure out what the common denominator is.
Just reading this thread you want to control the direction of the thread. You want to control how much influence your W's friends have on her. There are certain things in life we have no control over. We certainly can control how we react but that is really about it.
