How do you deal with the HATE?

[Augtan]

Kick me, so sorry you are here, but you are in a good place for advice! I would suggest you switch therapist's too. When you call to get information on a new one, make it very clear that your H is in MLC and that you are going there to save your marriage and there is to be no discussion of any other options at all, D is not on the table at all!!

Anger is a hard thing! I have had anger issues according to my XH for years! I was not always the perfect, nice all the time wife, but I don't think I was off the hook mean or angry! I tell him now all the time, that "yes, now I am angry, and I am angry about what you have done to our family, me, and our kids, but anger is a human emotion and I am learning how to deal with my anger in a more positive way" He could careless. He is in MLC, was with an OW, but now he just runs around like he is 21 again!

Tell us more of your story! Do you think there is an OW? Mine turned so mean when he was having the affair, it was crazy! Had always treated me nice, spoke to me nice, called me many times a day, told me each day I was the love of his life, etc. Then, almost overnight was the meanest person I had ever known! He would say such awful things! When I did find out about the OW and we started therapy, the therapist said he was mean out of guilt and it was a good thing, cause it meant he had guilt which some don't. Well, in our situation, the guilt didn't matter, the OW was saying and doing everything right while I was home crying and a mess. Long story, could go on and on, but this is about you!

Get the books or re-read them if you already have them, follow it to the letter, if I had found this site and those books when all mine started, we would still be married, I am sure of it! I did everything wrong for so long, it seems to be too late for us. But, it has helped me to DB for me, made me see things I never would have otherwise and changed me forever!

Keep coming here to vent, don't share much with friends or family!

A