Completely Blindsided

[fullmoon]

I know... it's really hard when you are far. Hang in there B.

For the first month or so I was really emotional, we exchanged some blame emails and over the phone we continued arguing. Then he stopped taking my calls.
We don't have any kids or own any assets together, so really we had nothing to contact each other about. All there is are those boxes with our stuff now reaching the shore of his country.

After reading the DR book I realised I have to first detach myself from all these... GAL as the vets say.
Detach so that I can see it all from another perspective w/o being too emotional, as if I'm reading someone else's stitch.
Otherwise I'd be too biased to see what role I played in our M not working. I have to do this for myself and not solely for our M, to have a better R with anyone.

It's really difficult detaching though... it feels as if our R is slipping away and will be gone forever if I don't hang on to it.
It got a lot easier when I realised some things just need time, and like all things in life some things are not in my control no matter what I do.
I also thought that we are only at the 'entry level' of our M... if we can't communicate properly, how can we tackle bigger things in life that are yet to come, isn't it better it's come out now and not later?
And to properly communicate, I first needed to be 'me' and not be drowned in 'us' if you know what I mean (detach)... making a list of things I want to do in near future and actually starting a few etc, keep reminding myself that it's not the end of the world.
I cut all contact from him for over a month. The first week or two was really difficult but now I'm a lot calmer. soon I will be ready to communicate in the positive manner if the opportunity arises.


Have you read the DR book?