Got a call from the bank today.

Closing could be as soon as Thursday, if X is available.

Great news--they can do it right at my house. (MY house! hear that??) And THEY write out the check to X (a big chunk coming from mortgage, and a big chunk from my savings) So I write out a check to the mortgage company, not to X! Don't know why that feels like a relief, but it does,

So--yeah. Close the house, close the bank, close out 23 years of my life.

I still drive and cry. But I also find myself laughing a little bit now and then.

but I would still give anything for a chance to press the "undo" button.