Rys, I'm going to say something now that you need to consider and it's coming from a place of compassion and concern. You are acting like a crazy person right now. You are letting bad thoughts consume you and worse yet you are calling your H every few minutes to tell him about it. If you don't get some help, today, right this minute, he may decide that you are unfit as a mother and have your S come live with him.
I'm saying this to you to hopefully wake you up to what your behavior is saying to the outside world. Be cautious, get some help, keep your S out of your issues.
