People in affairs are ADDICTS. To the extent that "engaging in dialog" with an addict will yield fruitful insights, then yeah -- it'll work.
You're more likely to get blameshifting, gaslighting and deceit. Not a real problem in and of itself, if the betrayed spouse SEES it as that, but the problem is, many LBSs take the convo to heart, start adjusting their strategy, and making all kinds of DBing mistakes.
