Right after we separated, we talked about reasons for W's unhappiness with our marriage and herself. Then I discovered A and realized she was blaming marriage and escaping thru A.
While talking about finances yesterday, she reiterated her unhappiness with her life the past few years (a lot of work pressures, etc.).
What she doesn't see yet is having and continuing A isn't the best solution to her unhappiness. It brought feelings of infatuation and excitement but has only made more trouble for her, imo (she's now helping to support two households, the OM may not have a job, and she's got a longer commute to work b/c she chose to live in another town).
I think in her mind she thought leaving me would make her life easier, but it's only made it more difficult.
I asked my latest questions because I didn't know if engaging in dialogue with her about what she said yesterday would do any good. I did send her a short line similar to the ones suggested but didn't know if something longer was appropriate while doing NC.
